Continued... by Greg

So anyway, Al started the night a pussy but we were in fine form by about 2am. When hot wax was being poured on chests we knew the night was getting good, or it was about to go downhill very quickly. Gaz (English Bartender) started telling us about his... i mean his friends experience with hookers in Amsterdam as Al listened intently. Next came the table breaking and then Shaun (Canadian Bartender) called Lauren (Australian Bartender) TnL (Tall and Lanky). Shaun the proceeded to save (hit on her) from Billy, the resident drinker extraodinaire. All in all twas a good night and I went to sleep on the floor at a casual 5am.

A massive night.

So we were staying at this pub in London and Al wanted to go to bed at like 5pm. But Greg made him get up and drink. Then it was like closing time and the manager showed up smashed with some random band so the pub opened again. It was leadsinger's birthday -he looked 18 but was turning 27. As an incentive for us to stay we were given free drinks. Anyway, as time is about to run out at this internet cafe, what happened was Alastair ended up working behind the bar while the manager went off with this guy called Grant (who may come and stay with us next year) and ended up passing out in the corridor at about 7am. To be continued...

More stuff we have learned

According to this police billboard, it's a common misconception here that "I get drunk and give her a couple of knocks around -the police don't take that stuff seriously anyway" is true... Interesting place.

Alaso, all the beers here have wierd stigmas associated with them. For example, instead of Stella being classy it is called 'the wifebeater' because it apparently makes you violent. Damn you Clifford, with your Stella and your rape. And Carlsberg is considered really trashy.

Things we have learned in London so far

1. Nothing.
2. Nothing
3. Don't bother talking to Welsh people. You will only understand one word per sentence and you'll go from talking about rugby to being offered Portuguese hash and have no idea how the conversation got to that.
4. Al is really muscley and would be a much better rugby player than Greg, UK people are hilarious! Also, Greg, being scrawny and all, would have not as much success with the rich sluts of Richmond.
5. Greg is the man for "not having to ask his missus for permission to go overseas".
6. We're in England for the pound. THE POUND!
7. Apparently we look like terrorists -we got massively questioned at Heathrow.
8. English people can't do kiwi accents.
9. Jamie is a massive loser. He has a fake ex-girlfriend. Kayla apparently doesn't exist, having failed to meet her twice when she was apparently there.
10. You can't drink off jet lag.
11. Frangelico and beer is actually quite nice. Well at least we remember it to be...
12. We 'spied' a Sushi restaurant in Piccadily called Itsu that is to die for so we went 'rushin' over there but it was all boarded up with cops outside. But we still left 'glowing'.

Who said we werent multicultural?

Right now we have purchased authentic Taiwanese drink.... 2 cans of "C is for Creative People who drink C", 1 Can of C&C Vitamin C Drink and one box of Fin, it appears to be dolphin juice.

Taipei

We are in Taipei. At the airport. Greg is taking a nap somewhere so I went to find the internet. Everything here is is asian so I'm having a bit of trouble.

The hotel was sweet - 5 star. So we stole as much shit as we could. Unfortunately a lack of space meant we couldn't take the bath robes.

There were these wierd green plum things that tasted like apples at breakfast. I shall name this new discovery "green apple plum".

We tried to go to a market last night, but it started closing up when we got there. Rascist. Also, when we go through customs they don't even look at our passports because we are white. Racism is awesome.

Anyway, flight is bording in 5 minutes so I better sign off.

The Departure

We are at Auckland Airport. Al has had severe issues spelling departure. That's pretty much it.

Oh and we won $3 on the instant kiwis so spent it on out-dated pixie-caramels.

Al can't spell caramels either.

Bon Voyage (to ourselves). We hope you all have a boring summer -ours will be better.