Bratislava, Slovakia -not as shithouse as you might think

I'm currently sitting in a backpackers in downtown Bratislava, the esteemed capital of Slovakia. In fact, as the t-shirts the waiters at the restaurant we were at last night were wearing said, "Bratislava very nice place to start new life." It even included a graph of sunshine hours. I wanted to buy one but they didn't have any left of the one I wanted.

Dinner last night was actually free, courtesy of this sweet Scottish dude we met in the hostel (he had to get rid of his Slovak crowns before leaving for Austria). The first thing Alex ever said to us was that he had only been in Slovakia for an hour and he had already bought drugs and slept with a hooker. Apparently she was gorgeous, but he didn't cum because he was too used to his girlfriend. This made the hooker angry.

Bratislava is a nice city -actually nicer than New Zealand cities. Having said that, we have actively sort out some photo opportunities to play up to our stereotypes. Unfortunately we couldn't take any photos from the castle (or of it really) because it was so damn foggy. We might see if it is better today before we go to Brno, Czech Republic.

Also, it is colder here. 0 degrees actually. This is my justification for drinking the last two nights (we have drunk something every night since Osnabrueck where we were to hungover). The first night was some mystery spirit, perhaps a schnapps-like substance, distilled from pears. It tasted like pear. Even though we left the hostel to get something to eat/drink relatively drunk, somehow we sobered up completely in 30min. Strange stuff.

Then there is the slovak beer -it is good. I like it. Though for some reason it says 10% on the front of the bottle and 4.3% on the back. I think it is probably 4.3% because the 12% Grolsch Canon we had in Eindhoven tasted awful and this doesn't.

Oh and we met a Selwynite here last night. They're fucking everywhere.

Heading east, we hope at least (I'm a poet and I didn't realise)

We are about to leave for Slovakia. I don't really know what to expect. It should be a bit different to other places I guess. Anyway I just thought I should put up a post in case they don't have the internet yet...

I'll leave you with a quote from Eurotrip about Bratislava:

Scotty: Is there a train soon to Berlin?
Local: Oh yes very soon -they are building it right now.

Austria? More like Austr-lets-get-some-beers.

So we went for a walk around the city. We never really knew where we were going so we don't know what sites we saw... I remember seeing the summer residence of the Hapsburgs or whatever those fellas were called, a drunk 14 year old at a Christmas market who tried to talk to me (unfortunately morality won out there... 16 did you say?!), and a guy in the subway that wanted one of our beers (of course we fucking want all of these 24-slab of 0.5 litre 5% beers! The nerve of some of these Austrians...).

So tonight we have some beers to drink thanks to Penny Markt -increasingly our favourite budget supermarket above Aldi. And the cheap beer isn't even particularly nasty. Happy times in Vienna.

We will try and post when we are done drinking, but the next post may be from Bratislava in Slovakia.

Comments

We have replied to some comments put up. Finally. So if you guys put more comments up (like what you've been up to or some shit) we will try to reply more often now.

In other news, we got up at midday today so have an afternoon to explore Vienna by day. Then we'll probabaly get hammered. We are about to get some italian spaghetti or something because our hosts are italians from the northern german-speaking region of Italy (Tirol I think). This also means that there is no way in hell I can understand their german when they talk to each other (it's a mix of Italian and German with Swiss and Austrian dialects -the two most difficult to understand...). But we are managing to communicate fine... kind of.

And apparently the subway here is free for tourists... effectively. Well actually not at all. But apparently they never bother sending out fines to foreign countries so you get away with it, if you're unlucky enough to get caught. Anyway, "Alex Peterson" and "Flex McBeer" might just have to lie about where they live.

Yeah so not much more news.

Don't be such a wiener (´do you get it? Wien is German for Vienna. Funny times right?)

We just got to Vienna. It took all day. We are staying at a flat that is decidedly scarfie. We are drinking beer, smoking flavoured tobacco, and Manuel just went to get 20g (that's a lot isn't it?). Should be a good night... LOL ROFLMAO!!!!11one Teehee wuv u (apparently -that was from Greg)

Time to make like Berlin and split...

I'm actually sitting in an internet cafe in Nuremberg -we are on our way to Vienna. Berlin was so sweet -thanks go to our hosts Mike and Steff! Anyway I'm hungery like Steve so I'm gonna go get my grub on... and find out what grub Greg put on and if it was good...

Al wants an east Berlin boyfriend

Actually not, but Greg tried to urinate in a lift and then pick up a girl from the Santa thingy. Then these four asian girls had a massive fight in the middle of the shopping market. Yeah so today we went to the really east bit of east Berlin. Just like the stereotypes pretty much. Also, we tried to drive down some train tracks... Not that much happened today.

The camera is dead -so maybe no photos from now on. Fuck you KCSC. I wouldn't have taken the free camera if I had known it was as crap as the Medieval Battle this year. Maybe if their secretary wasn't such a hottie, (Greg added that, I was going for a different word...) they would get something done in meetings other than urinating on each other.

Ich bin ein Berliner (and VIP)

BERLIN!!! This city rocks! Amazingly beautiful and historic by day (but I don't know what they showed on tours before reunification because seriously most of the cool buildings are in the east -could be because the Russians carpet bombed the bit that had been promised to the Allies...) and by night, well I never thought I'd say this but the clubbing is amazing.

Well particulary amazing when your host has all the right connections and gets you into one of the most exclusive clubs for free because his friend -a top DJ- is playing and then you get taken to the VIP room where there is free vodka and redbull and a guy whose sole job is to get you anything you want and the cool people you're hanging out with apparently were all major German actors and producers and the like. Massive night. We got home at like 5am and the club was still getting started.

Then last night we were at a party for the closing of some 5-star hotel. Another VIP event. Red carpet, paparrazi (who photographed us, then asked who we were and seemed a little disappointed -better lie next time), and apparently heaps of celebrities. It didn't really go off, but it was still cool to be there.

Oh and we're loading upon cheap kebabs (€1) -East Berlin represent!